Is Adoption Right For Me? Questions To Ask Yourself
When faced with an unplanned pregnancy, most women don’t consider adoption. They don’t know much about it. But once they learn more about what adoption really is, they often come to see it as a wonderful way of dealing with a very difficult situation. That being said, adoption is not the right decision for everyone. We believe that each woman is unique, and their adoption or parenting plan should reflect that. If you’re wondering if adoption is a good fit for you and your baby, here are some questions to ask yourself.
What are my reasons for considering adoption?
Every woman who considers placing her baby for adoption has different reasons for her choice. That’s okay. There is no one “right” or “wrong” reason to place your child for adoption. For whatever reason(s) you are considering adoption, trust that your instincts come from a loving place, and that no one else needs to “approve” of your choice, but you. For more information about common reasons that birth mom’s consider placing their baby, you can read our blog, “Common Reasons Birth Moms Consider Placing Their Baby.”
What are my goals for my life?
Only you know what your goals are for your future. Some people may tell you that considering your future means valuing your goals over the well-being of your baby. We disagree. Considering adoption is a very tough but loving choice. Considering your future is not only good for you, it is good for your baby. Chances are, you aren’t exactly where you want to be in life. Considering adoption not only gives you a chance to get where you would like to be, but gives your baby a loving home while you do this. Being a parent and achieving your goals is definitely not impossible, but being a new parent can make these objectives hard to achieve. Thinking long term is very important; to be the best parent possible (now and possibly in the future), you need to consider your goals for yourself and your future.
What do I want for my baby’s life?
Chances are, there are reasons you are considering adoption instead of parenting. You want to provide your baby with the best life possible, and sometimes life circumstances make this difficult to do. Adoption is a loving and secure way to provide your baby with the life you imagine for them. You can choose the type of family you want your baby to grow up in. You get to decide if you want a heterosexual couple, a same-sex couple, or a single parent. If you have preferences about other aspects of the adoptive parents, such as their personalities, occupations, lifestyle, or place of residence, you can choose that as well. You have hopes and dreams for your baby. If you are not in a place to provide these for your child at this time, adoption is a great choice.
What type of adoption is right for me?
The best part about adoption today is that you’re in control. The adoption plan for your baby will be your plan, based on your choices. There are several different types of adoption: open adoption, semi-open adoption and closed adoption. Each plan has a varying amount of involvement, both in the adoption process and in the future. Many women choose to have an open adoption. This means that you get to pick the family, based on lots of information about who they are and what kind of home they will provide for your baby. You can also decide how much contact you’ll have with the family, both before and after the baby is born. You can choose to make all of, or none of, the decisions when placing your baby. You’re in control, and your adoption plan will be as unique as you are.